Transcendental Grief !

 I read somewhere about the five stages of grief. I want to reflect on them. Our pain is so much personal and so much important, it makes us the real human. The overwhelming childish desire to want everything in life makes us so vulnerable to the pains we carry in later stages of life. Grief is life, it is transcendental, and it is instrumental in becoming us who we were always meant to be. Some sensitive souls cannot carry the heavy burden of the grief in their lives... so instead they become artists, poets, writers and dancers. They transform their pain into the work of art making it handbook for the others who are new into this crisis. 

Stories are numerous around us; no tragedy is small ...the only tragedy is that one was never heard enough. We all deserved to be heard, with open minded, may we all get desired listeners in our lives who could sooth our souls and hearts. 

This world is big theatre as Shakespeare puts it, everyone has their entrance and exits, everyone is consumed by their role playing that we cannot see anything else. The empathy and wisdom lie in rising above your role and fitting into someone else's shoes. The transcendental grief makes you superhuman, immune to personal injuries and selfish acts, you become vessel for others to absorb their pain. You understand natural law that life is not about taking, it is about giving...and doing your best. The beauty lies in being selfless, no matter how angry, how incomplete you feel...you never overcome your personal grief until you take part in the divine participation. The scheme is to understand the pain everyone carries and be a vessel to absorb that pain. 

I have been very lucky that my close friends can easily cry before me, and I can cry before them without being judged. We have made it extremely easy to have difficult conversations and this bond is transformational is so many levels, I only have two friends. And I don't think I'll be able to cultivate more friends in my life, by 35 you're already a halfway down the lane.

Once you spend decades in your personal grief, it teaches you to be humble and empathetic. It teaches you that like you everyone else around is vulnerable, weak and sentimental. We all have that missing peace of puzzle that makes us so incomplete that we begin to yearn to greater things like prayer and seeking God. Without pain, no human being would have required God. It is part of being human. 

We all must respect these little griefs. Guard them. Transform them into literature. so those who are lost in this valley can find the divine footprints in your story. Pain is always educational; God always teaches us through the pain. The great enlightenment and catharsis take place when you carry profound pain in your chest to the extent that every bone of your body feels it.  It exhausts you, it drains your intellectual energies, you cannot rationalize with it, it is not mathematical, it is unending psychosis and then you're blessed with supreme divine closure. 

By the age of 35, you begin to forgive those who wronged you, who assassinated your character, soul, dignity and esteem. You are Darwish then, so significant yet so common, extraordinary yet so mediocre, you lose your individuality into this grief, it becomes your story, it becomes your introduction, and your pain is how people know you and connect you with. 

In the month of Muharram, I see these millions of people manifesting divine grief of Imam Hussain, we all can relate to it. we feel it personally, as if it represents our tiny pains and tragedies, it is the mother of all tragedies of our civilization. And then you see, the act of surrender, act of divine bow, and transcendence in the love of Allah... it teaches us to be selfless and sacrifice our egos for the greater good. Allah will compensate us, He knows our grief meanwhile we can mourn this grief till eternity to be able to feel alive, to feel God, and to heal our tiny pains.